So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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