that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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