She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize