Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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