You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
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