First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
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