It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
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