their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Define "chronic" masturbator.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?