I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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