whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
