I swear she didn't look like that last week.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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