I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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