it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
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the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
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Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.