I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
