Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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