yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
