ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
a search helicopter?!
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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