This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
You left your phone here
Wait...
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