If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
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