she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Randomize
