Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
