Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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