YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
