Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Randomize