So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I cut my penus on the lid.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
