I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
