We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
