yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Randomize
