plz talk dirty to me
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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