glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
