Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
