rhymes with "ouble enetration"
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
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