just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
