His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Randomize
