great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
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