Betty ford says i'm here all night
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
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