i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Randomize
