I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
