I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
my nose is crying tears of wow.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
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