I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Randomize
