She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
