Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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