this beer tastes like vomit already
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Randomize