Dual....:-)
Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
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