It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
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