i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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