ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
I could make wine with my vomit
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
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