they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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