so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I miss vodka workout Fridays
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
