giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Sober January is a disaster.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
