just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
So much Jack, so little girl.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
