On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
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